#this more than makes up for the lack of art
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You got it. The friends-to-lovers trope when the friendship part isn’t just forgotten: but evolved.
“Love is friendship caught fire; it is quiet, mutual confidence, sharing and forgiving. It is loyalty through good and bad times. It settles for less than perfection, and makes allowances for human weaknesses. Love is content with the present, hopes for the future, and does not brood over the past. It is the day-in and day-out chronicles of irritations, problems, compromises, small disappointments, big victories, and working toward common goals. If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things you lack. If you do not have it, no matter what else there is, it is not enough.” - Laura Hendricks
All always love a love that is built from and grounded in friendship because it is THE foundation for romance. The “love is friendship caught on fire” sentiment encapsulates Xena and Gabrielle so well. Even visually.
They did this relationship so right mostly because they just let it be what it wanted to be and evolve on its own.
And what it wanted to be naturally is friends-to-lovers. I do not think there’s a more satisfying slow burn in all of TV art/entertainment better than Xena and Gabrielle.
Relationships are so beautiful when you and your partner are genuinely good friends. You show up together, share inside jokes, talk openly, have fun, and totally vibe like besties. They shouldn’t replace your actual friends but it’s so amazing when the dynamic isn't only romantic
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Constant Companions Closeup #1: DYAD
(also on spotify!)
Hello everyone!! It's been a couple weeks and change since Constant Companions, my newest album, was released unto the world, and I've been genuinely blown away by the response. Genuinely, thank you to everyone who's been streaming, commenting, making mashups, changing their pfps and usernames - it means the world to me!
I wanted to give some of that love back with something people have been asking me a lot about - and, admittedly, something I love doing. Song explanations! Deep dives! Dropping the lore! Welcome... to the Constant Companions Closeups...
For the next eleven days, I'll be going into each track one by one and babbling about the process, inspiration, details, feelings, and thoughts behind each one! We're getting sappy. We're bearing our hearts. We're telling unfunny jokes. And we're starting with track one - DYAD (featuring unit.0)!
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Naturally, since this is the first track, it also serves as a great point to talk about my intention with this album as a whole!
I'll elaborate more on this with future tracks, but to me, there are really two main things that define the sonic progression of this album versus my previous work - guitars and vocal synths. Obviously, these things have been present in my work since I first started calling myself Jamie Paige, but Constant Companions is intended to be my overwrought, sappy confession of love to these two things that time and time again have made me simply want to make music. I love rock and I love Hatsune Miku dammit!!!
I had originally written this song in February of 2023 for a game-jam-esque online festival hosted by my friend Loni called HAPPY PARTY TRI, and at that time, I had found myself at a major crossroads. I had put out People Posture Play Pretend and :women_wrestling: the previous year, and while the response was nice, I was feeling listless and lost.
I love singing. I like my voice well enough. I certainly love writing music with lyrics!! But... there was something uniquely electrifying about using vocal synths. Amidst a lot of insecurity and emotional turmoil surrounding the process of making art and putting myself out into the world, it was one of the few things that just made everything feel right. Suddenly, I was making the same kind of music that had touched my heart so many times over.
Would it alienate people, though? Would I lose longtime listeners? Yes, that weighed on my mind more than I'd like to admit, but even more than that... I was worried I'd lose some part of myself, as silly as it sounds. Maybe what I thought was a bridge would become a barrier, and the messages I wanted to send across the gap would never find their way.
Ultimately, I felt that Dyad was the only kind of opener I could've possibly given this album, and a perfect fit for the album's motif. A dialogue between myself, stricken with loneliness and a lack of inertia running in circles, and that synthesized voice (ANRI Arcane my darling), grabbing the outstretched hand and asking a question I already know the answer to -
"Baby, do you know what you wanna hear?"
Yes, it's a love song, but it's not just for a person - it's a love song for the creative impulse, and for the places I wanted it to take me.
im resisting the urge to be jokingly dismissive of myself to diffuse tension but i still need to signal that the emotionally bare part of this is over so pretend im doing a funny little dance Anyways let's talk more technical stuff
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Like many of my songs, Dyad came together from a patchwork of different snippets and ideas I had laying around. The back half of the chorus - "dream together, we can dream together" - originally came from this idea I had jotted down something like 9 months prior, but ended up being a perfect fit for Dyad in basically every way. The verse snippet that I'd written to go with it got reused for a later song on Constant Companions as well! (I say without naming it, as if it isn't literally lifted wholesale from this demo and thus incredibly obvious)
I wasn't originally planning on brazenly quoting the bridge of a Tally Hall song when I set out to write this song, but while toying around with a bridge idea involving a shortened version of the pre-chorus melody, I realized I had inadvertently copied it anyways. I was going to scrap it... but at the request of my dear friend and certified Tally Hall lover Marcy Nabors, I made it an explicit reference. Which I'm fine with, personally! The first CD I ever owned was a copy of Marvin's Marvelous Mechanical Museum my sister bought me all the way back in 2006 - You can pry that sentimental attachment from my cold, dead hands, TikTok kiddies.
Lastly - not really behind the scenes so much as just a shoutout - thank you to unit.0 for the lovely lead guitar work on this song!! He's been a beloved collaborator of mine for many, many years now, and one of the people who ultimately convinced me this direction was the right one to go in, so it means a lot to share this song with him. Go listen to his music!!! Now!!!!!!
That's about it for this song! Not to sound like a fucking YouTuber, but genuinely, if there are any details you'd like to hear more about, let me know and I might made a bonus post at the end of all this. Otherwise, thank you for listening! Tomorrow: Not Quite There, featuring telebasher!
❤️💚
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Winter.
When did this happen? Was I looking away for long enough for the season to change without my notice? I haven’t spent enough time here watching time, from this old velvet seat by the window that overlooks brutalist blocks, each building identical to the next. These utilitarian slabs might stand like this, grey cubes jutting from the asphalt, for five hundred years. I’m here for five months now. Thoroughly settled, used to this place, this apartment with the tarry flavour of cigarettes clinging to the furniture the landlady never took away.
Jonas says she’s strange, this woman who has left all of her old things for us to live around. Her lamps, with sun-faded shades, her record collection, the chenille bedspreads stuffed into a closet, and the ancient television I replaced the day after I landed. I’ve never met her. Sometimes, I slip a dusty bottle from her wine rack in the cellar and serve it to my friends at dinner. Surely, by the time she ever notices, I’ll be long gone.
Through the vignette of condensation, the snow drifts, white flecks, across the beam of the streetlights. Kreuzberg is quiet. Sunday.
I refocus my eyes to look into my face, a mirror reflection in the black window. I look older, perhaps, than in the photographs Jen posted to me in September, the ones from the summer, where the light is hazy and our noses are sun blushed, from that time that feels like another lifetime already, or like fiction. At Christmas, I returned to Ireland, and it rained for two weeks without stopping, and it felt something more like reality.
My grandmother told me that my hair was straggly, and she’s right. It’s been too long since I’ve cut it, but the ends of my hair spent the summer with me. Even though my skin cells have replaced themselves, the parts of my hair touching the collar of my coat and curling around my ears hold the memories that the rest of me is slowly losing.
I haven’t stayed in touch with my friends from there as much as I would have liked. These days are busy, with friends, with college. I draw and paint more than I ever have, lashing out piece after piece, sketchbook after sketchbook, building a tower upon the desk in my cold little bedroom, though the women in my pieces don’t have green eyes anymore. Now, I choose blue.
The door buzzes, and I stand to answer it.
My finger on the button, “Yeah?”
“Hurry! Open up, it’s fucking cold.”
I buzz her in, then stand waiting by the open door as she ascends the stairway. Three floors. I hear her the whole way, the snap of boot heels against tile. There’s an elevator in her building, and I feel acutely guilty about my building’s lack of one, despite being entirely powerless to do anything about it, as I am an art student, not an engineer, and was not yet actually born during its construction.
She appears on the landing, shivering, with snowflakes clinging to her hair, and sitting on the structured shoulders of her trench coat.
“Ugh, oh God, those stairs. I hate them.” She says. She unzips her boot and tosses onto the pile of shoes next to the door, and I notice immediately that she’s barefoot, toes balanced on the tiles like a ballerina.
“You didn’t wear socks?”
She’s not wearing tights either. Her long, pale legs poke, completely exposed beneath the beige gabardine.
“Did you take the U-Bahn like this? It must be five below zero.”
Her second boot hits the tile with a clatter, and she backs me into my apartment. As the door clicks shut, she pulls on the tie of her coat.
She’s wearing nothing but black lingerie.
“Ah,” I am enlightened. This now makes perfect sense to me, in much the same way it does to her. Astrid has a way of bringing me around to her way of thinking.
This was actually an excellent idea.
“I was bored,” she says, which makes sense too. She is always bored. This is why she does what she’s seen people do in films. It’s a way to keep herself entertained. An unwelcome thought flashes into my mind, as I wonder if she has done this specific thing for previous boyfriends. I hop off that path. With Astrid, it is important to dwell only upon the present. Anything before this, now, me, us, is nothing worth worrying about.
I slip my hands under her coat, onto the soft, downy velvet of her skin.
“Nice and warm,” she murmurs.
“Astrid, you shouldn’t have gone out like this.”
“It was only thirty minutes.”
“I know, but,” Her hands are freezing between mine as I heat them with my breath. “It’s too cold.” I’ll have to give her something of mine to wear when she goes home, but begin to worry that nothing is clean. I have been avoiding taking my dirty clothes to the basement since I flew back in ten days ago, too cowardly to face the seizing cold of the communal laundry room and that ever present leak in the ceiling surely turned to an icicle by now.
These are not sexy thoughts.
It’s like she can tell just by looking at me. “The point is, you will heat me up,” she says, a bit slowly, like I’m thick.
I don’t want to be the guy that lacks spontaneity. That would make me anxious. She pulls her hands from mine and pouts at me, as though at a little dog. “Look at you, you’re so nice.”
It’s not intended as a compliment, and I understand I should be doing something a bit wilder, like, I don’t know, taking my own clothes off already. Why on earth haven’t I started to do that?
Ah, because I am nice.
“Okay, fuck your hands then. They can freeze.” Often, jokes are a mistake around Astrid. She rarely laughs at them. In fact, she rarely smiles at all, and only indulges us when she feels like doing it. It’s never to be polite. She knows her own mind. I’m obsessed with her.
I’m obsessed to an ever greater extent now, because, once again, she’s not laughing. She’s not trying to please me. It’s me, always, trying to please her instead. I tug on her coat and it pools to the floor, then I kiss her.
“God, I love you.”
I murmur it, the truth.
I knew it the third or fourth night we spent together, in November, as the last stubborn leaves clung to the branches. She wasn’t like anybody I had ever met before. She reminded me of nobody, and that was the point.
I felt it, that weakness, my molten insides, and the deep fear of it in the early hours of one morning as she lay on the sheets with moonlight spilling across her back. She has a tattoo between her shoulder blades of a heart pierced by three daggers. She says it’s from a tarot card, and she was younger and stupider when she got it. That night, as she slept, I uncovered some kind of symbolism in it that moved me, but in the morning light I had forgotten all the profound thoughts I’d come up with except one: That I loved her. It surprised me. I ignored the tiny pang of sadness I felt, like mourning for a part of my life that was already long gone. It was useless to miss it.
I chose Astrid instead.
I choose her now, love her in the same way I kiss her and touch her and fuck her, by doing what she wants me to do. It’s not a submissive situation. I’m not into that stuff. I am a man clocking in and doing as he's asked, thoroughly, diligently, excelling at his job. Eager to please. Employee of the month.
“Will you put your hand on my throat?” She breathes. Beneath me, her hands claw the bedsheets.
Yes, I think. That would be nice.
I am interested to discover that I like it too. I don’t think the other girls I’ve slept with would have let me try the things that Astrid does. They couldn’t picture themselves doing it, I’m sure, and neither could I. Back then I didn’t think about sex the way I do now, but Berlin has been bringing it out in me.
She comes first. That’s mandatory. Then afterwards, when I have, and thoughts return to my brain, I’ll lay here, haunted by the years I didn’t know about this golden rule, and all the time that I thought I was good at sex but wasn’t. Dwelling on the disappointment I brought upon women and girls will make me spiral a bit, I’ll feel it rising, but I’ll feel better when I fuck Astrid again, in some new, fascinating position, and she’ll tell me I’m pretty good, in fact.
She’ll be loud enough about it that Klaus from downstairs may complain, and point out that such volume levels are forbidden on Sundays. He’ll threaten to raise it with the building management, so I’ll bring up the fact I know it was he who put cat food containers in the recycling bin. Neither of us will do anything, and the cycle will repeat until one of us moves or dies.
“Klaus is a miserable, jealous old fool,” Astrid says. “He probably doesn’t have sex, so he’s furious at people who do. I think it’s basic psychology.”
“He lives with his wife, you know.”
“Oh, that doesn’t mean he’s having sex. Married people don’t do it. Or at least hardly ever. That’s why I’ll never be tied down like that.”
“I don’t think that’s true.”
“You think Mr and Mrs Klaus are fucking like rabbits down there?”
I scrunch up my face. “I’ve never heard them. Maybe they do it very quietly while I’m out of the apartment.”
“They never do. I bet they hate one another. Surely they sleep in separate rooms and only speak when they have to.” Astrid invents this story with glee. She is describing what is to her an indisputable fact of life. Her parents, and her mother’s relationship with her stepfather, too. I think she believed these things about marriage before meeting me, but the confirmation that my parents are the same has solidified it.
“I don’t like to think about things in such a black and white way,” I say, and hold my palm against hers. Her fingers are long and slender. “Just because a lot of marriages are bad, doesn’t mean they’re all doomed. I believe some people are happy.”
“Trapped,” she whispers. “Like canaries in a cage. Maybe they don’t know any better.”
“If I was married, it’d be because I loved that person completely. I wouldn’t do it unless I was sure, and if I loved someone that much, I think I’d still have sex all the time. I can’t really picture that changing. When would I ever not be doing it, you know?”
She hums gently. “So you would never join a monastery.”
“Ugh.”
“And if you married me, you’d want me like this forever?”
This isn’t a serious question about marriage. That would be ridiculous. This is a test for me to pass, and am about to, with flying colours.
“Yeah, you’re so appealing in every way. I can’t imagine not being completely crazy about you forever.”
“You definitely wouldn’t get over me if I left you.”
“Nah, probably not. In my grief, I might even refuse to sign the divorce papers or some shit.”
She nods, satisfied, and rests her head on my chest. It slots nicely beneath my chin. “I want to go to sleep,” she says.
“Alright, me too.”
I switch off the light and listen to the pitter patter of the snow on the window, drifting slowly away with it.
Astrid shifts, restless.
“Tomorrow, I have a lecture at eight.”
“Unlucky.”
“I don’t have any clothes.”
“Ah, yeah, probably because of the lingerie stunt.”
A pout. “It was a gift for you.”
“And I loved it. I can find you something to wear.”
“To my class? Your clothes? I’ll look ridiculous. Can you get me a taxi to my house so I can change?”
“Yeah, of course. If you wear my clothes in the taxi.”
“I won’t be naked under my coat in front of a strange man, Jude.”
“Okay. Good. I’ll arrange a taxi, then.”
“That’s sweet of you.” She adjusts her position again, and the subtle contact of our bodies sets off a chain of sensation. I rake my nails lightly over her back, and she shudders.
“You’re so pretty,” I say. “Did you know that?” I know she does, but I like the smug way she always says yes.
“It’s okay if I leave my underwear here?”
“If you want to, yeah. Why? Do you think I wanted to carry it around in my pocket or something?”
“So you can wash it for me.”
“Yeah,” I press my lips to the back of her hand. “I’ve been meaning to go to the laundry basement for too long now. I’ll just add them to the pile.”
“No, you need to hand-wash them. They’re made of lace.”
“Oh right. So like, in the sink, or something.”
“I thought you might have known that.”
“Nah, see, in Dublin, we had a cleaner who washed all of my lace underwear for me.”
“Mm…”
“... That was a joke about the lace underwear. We did actually have a cleaner, though.”
“You’ll take care of it? They were quite expensive. It’s not as though I have a lot of that kind, so if it got ruined…”
“I will.”
She slips a hand into my hair and seeks my lips in the dark. She kisses me with such affection that I melt into her. “I love you, Jude. Thank you.”
“I love you too.”
A low chuckle as I bite her earlobe. “You really would never be a monk, would you?”
“Oh, my God. The thought makes me sick.”
I roll over her, and we give Klaus one more thing to complain about.
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#lucky boy 2011#prose is back baby!#sim spice#sims 4 storytelling#sims4 story#sims story#simblr#simblr story#sims 4 screenshots#sims 4#ts4#sims community
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General life- and blog update , since I assume at least a few people might have been wondering where I've been and what i've been up to recently. I obviously haven't been posting or drawing much this year in general. This will probably be an important post if you care about stuff on this blog, and I already rambled on Sheezy, but that site isn't very populated yet and it's also very good at hiding journals so let's just ramble again...
The summary of this post if you hate reading: I'm heavily considering just stepping away from Splatoon. That decision obviously would affect this blog (mostly, my OCs, which is kinda most of the blog at this point). I don't think the blog itself will go anywhere, and I'll probably use it for something in the future... alternatively i'll cherry pick stuff from here into an archive for people who like the worldbuilding.
Longer post under cut:
So what have I been up to this year? The answer is quite simple: NOTHING. Like, actually absolutely nothing. Aside from Art Fight, this has probably been one of my worst art output years of all time, which is really frustrating. That's between my horrendous mental health and depression chasms this year and a complete lack of both focus and inspiration (which can also get chalked down to the depression to a degree, yeah). So the very real reason to why there hasn't been much activity on this blog this year is because I just haven't Done Anything in general.
Now because I know there will be a few people who think "that's fine! you shouldn't judge yourself based on productivity!" you're right! I also agree. However the issue for me specifically is that most (if not all) the time I spend NOT drawing or creating, I spend sitting around wishing I could start drawing or creating, because that is like the 1 thing that keeps me sane on this freaking earth. Unfortunately coming up with OC scenarios in my head doesn't really result in output I can feel fulfilled by in any form as much as I wish it did, lol.
Now; The Issue. It doesn't take a genius to see that if you spend 9 months trying to finish like a dozen OC pages that you COULD do in a week or 2 if you wanted to, then there's probably more than just the problem of executive dysfunction (even though that's at least 60% of it for sure). Obviously my other major problem is that I live by imaginary rules and structures that make sense, but aren't actually useful at ALL in reality and are more than a hindrance if anything (the mental to do-list in my head that says i can't do X until I've done Y doesn't do very much if task Y takes 10 months and I also don't want to do it, and it also has no structured ending).
How does this tie into stepping away from Splatoon, you may ask. Well, the issue is that I have foreseeably fallen out of love with the series. Which isn't exactly news lol. Currently, I'm not even sure i will get the next game, if and when the time comes. Yes, the loss of interest is also expected, given that Splatoon 3 has ended and every fandom has this kind of downtime and lukewarm in-between-titles period. But the truth is that modern Splatoon (almost 10 years old!!!!) is tangibly different from the way the series was back when I fell in love with it. That was Splatoon 1, and while the series has improved in a lot of aspects and is thriving, it's grown in a direction that I just don't really like. Splatoon 3 had the most freaking horrendous, immersion breaking story mode they could've done, then they followed it up with a DLC story that was pretty cool but also compounded a lot of my fears about the series' future and played into every single thing i do not want Splatoon stories to be - fully character focused, random fucking villain, mundane event that's unrealistically world-threatening just because a kids video game needs a scary climax even though it's immersion breaking AGAIN, the whole thing taking place in cyberspace and thus offering basically no worldbuilding even though there is SO MUCH WORLD. I COULD GO ON.
The gist of it is that nowadays, rather than playing Splatoon and being inspired and excited at what comes next, I mostly find myself dreading what dumbass plot they will do next to throw a wrench in the otherwise good stuff. And when that's like THE main approach I have to what's supposed to be my favorite series, it is HARROWING. I can't even really blame the game for this; the story is NOT its selling point, the developers probably do their best to get the bits to us that they really want to tell, and at the end of the day the game is unfortunately a product. Worldbuilding for Splatoon is fun to a point. It's less fun when in order to actually write or create something coherent, instead of filling in the blanks, the blanks are 90% of the freaking thing. At that point you're just better off making something of your own instead of being anchored onto an IP that gives more problems than answers and occasionally shoots you with like a machine gun. Working in the realm of Splatoon is frustrating because more often than not, the questions I have ARE NOT MINE TO ANSWER, and the likelihood that the specific-ass questions I need answers to will ever be actually addressed is really low.
Tying this back to my OCs. Obviously I love my OCs more than I love myself which admittedly isn't that high of a bar but you get the point. The problem is that I spend a lot of time mulling over worldbuilding that, again, frankly isn't mine to do. Because if I want it to be Splatoon, then it should be mostly accurate to how Splatoon is! But the problem with that is that there's really not THAT MUCH worldbuilding in the series that you can work with, and most of the core game mechanics are just abstract enough that it's actually horrendous to try and come up with workarounds and ways for things to make sense that don't require just constructing a full knockoff version mirror dimension of the game and saying fuck everything that's in place here because Inkopolis Plaza literally has no roads in or out of there and I have no fucking idea how that's allowed when your only option is to jump the fence (or, nowadays, take the train which also isnt connected to a street as far as I remember). Between the face value issue and the lack of REALLY IMPORTANT worldbuilding, like - I will always come back to this - THE INK TANK'S FUNCTION 10 YEARS DOWN THE LINE - there's a goddamn ocean of plot holes and things that end up being obstacles to creativity rather than inspiration. I feel like I'm pretty solidly at the point (and have been for a while) where hanging onto Splatoon is really only contributing to creativity block and frustration with lack of freedom and the ability to actually do things.
So I guess those are my reasonings that I've put together just sitting here for the time being. The TL;DR is that I wish I could just do stuff without Splatoon's canon getting in the way, which is a really stupid problem to have if you're making Splatoon OCs. I feel this frustration extremely strongly every time I have to work with actual bigger aspects of the world; we still don't have an Inkopolis map, we don't know what the world around Inkopolis looks like, we don't know what the wilderness is like aside from Just Normal Forest and Desert and very few snippets as to what modern wildlife MIGHT be, I still don't know how the fuck the Inklings teleport to the goddamn arctic ocean to play a turf war at Shipshape Cargo co. These are all actually really important things if you're trying to establish a setting in any kind of storytelling that's outside of immediate city bounds (and even there, you need to know the layout of the city and its important areas). Also a fucking mutant bear and a baby salmon and a squid not wearing suitable gear went to space and fought on a rocket in space. These are some things that would give me peace of mind to not have to deal with in my own writing, probably.
So where do we go from here? Unsure. I haven't really made a decision on this front yet, though right now I'm leaning more towards actually going ahead with trying to do my own thing. That will result in obvious design and setting changes for my OCs whenever I get around to it. This blog probably won't go anywhere (again, unless I impulse delete it during a mood swing like i've almost done on like three separate occasions this year), but it will probably get less use, and I will probably end up making a new blog to post about whatever I end up doing once I get to a point where it feels like it makes sense. There's a chance that I will delete this blog and put all the interesting stuff on an archive blog for the people who are here just for the worldbuilding. My actual true passion for a long time now hasn't even been Splatoon anymore, it's just been cephalopods. I'm kind of done having Splatoon get in the way of the cephalopods, as thankful as I am that it introduced me to them...
If you read this to the end heres a treat for you = 🍪
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Throwing in my two pence here. This might get a little extensive and confusing, since I'm not great with words, so bear with me and trust me, ok?
First pence goes to this. Small thing on this being a non scripted series, yes, this is very true. None of the "curses" and stuff are planned, any references are usualy just thrown in for fun because the creators love watching us make our own stories and art, and Martyns lore is mostly his own AU that isn't connected to the main series.
But fandoms love making their own interpretations of stories, like Martyn does. It's why I have no problem with the "blessings and curses" of each participant. It's just the fan interpretations of funny coincidencs. The AUs we make. The fan content, artwork and stories, we make with the sturdy base of the life series. Jimmy and Martyn love reacting to fan made content, angsty or silly. They are loving it for the craft that it is! But they aren't canon, and never will be. Both sides know this. Scott's blessing won't always work, Grians widow curse won't always happen, and Jimmy's canary curse won't always play out quite the same as others expect it to do. Speaking of...
Time for that second penny. My interpretation of the Canary curse.
To me, the canary curse was NEVER about Jimmy being out first. It was NEVER about how he is bad at minecraft. It was NEVER about his permadeath being the the first one every time.
It was always about the chaos that came afterwards.
He wasn't cursed to die first, he was just the catalyst of disaster. When players would start to die left, right and center. It was a moment in every series where the red names would stack up and start to kill more and more, because now that a player had fallen, a sense of desperation falls across everyone. Dying first 4 times was just an unfortunate coincidence.
Jimmy is not awful at the game, he has some good skills. We can talk about that in a bit though.
The Canary in the coalmine might sometimes die to warn the coal miners of the poisons, but their silence without death speaks the exact same message.
Jimmy isn't cursed to die. Jimmy is blessed with a warning to everyone else that the end ic coming and discord wii be upon them soon.
And that warning is just his silence, through life and death.
He does not need to die for the Canary curse to come calling. Not to him. But to everyone.
Chucking in one extra penny, I would like to say that I very much think he can win. Genuinly, not having a laugh, not mocking it, and i'm not listening to anyone else. Session 3 gave me a scare, and i started doubting it, but i told myself (and Jimmy in chat) that i believe, and I was right to. Session 4 was amazing for him.
Jimmy is not bad at the game by any means. He can just be very unlucky. Events don't always line up for him so he ends up looking more incompetent than he is.
But when they do, well, just look at his 1v3 in dodgebolt and how he won the tournament for the crown in empires season 1, and remember how he spent the majority of Last life on YELLOW. And even episode 4 of wild life with how well he did in that session. I'm not saying he's the greatest minecraft player of all time because he does have his moments of lacking braincells like we all get, but he has got some skills. He just likes to mess about a bit to make things a little more entertaining for his viewers, he plays with his viewers in mind, but when he locks in, he very much locks in. And I love it.
I do still think he can win a life series. If not this one, maybe another one in the future. But I think he can do it. And if only one person in this universe believes that, then I am that one person.
Right, sorry if anything came off rude, im not the best at phrasing stuff so i might of misworded somethings here and there by accident. Again sorry if i did. I'm not here to change opinions, just to share my own. I'll leave now.
cries because everybody in this fandom sees the thought of Jimmy winning as a laughable impossibility and even people who say they're rooting for him only mean it as a joke and whenever you mention that he's doing good people have to let you know that it won't last long and inevitably he will die first because of some stupid self-fulfilling prophecy that got turned into my least favorite fanon ever. why can't he just be like a player who has a chance just like everyone else does. have you stopped to consider WHY he dies first so often? it's not a curse. this isn't a scripted series. it's because he's incredibly pacifistic and because people generally don't want to help him because they consider him a weak player. both of these things have been done away with this season, he has a taste for blood and an ally who is both incredibly underrated in his strength and has said he would never betray him. jimmy has as much a chance as anyone else.
#wild life#life series#jimmy solidarity#i wanna add something in the whole non scripted series segment about seperating characters from the real people#and the idea of these people minecraft personas being their own characters to the fandom. not the same entity.#but i couldnt make it flow quite right#the life series canon is the people#the fan interpretations are the characters#i think thats what i wanna say about that#but im not sure if i could ever word it perfectly.#ah well#im tired and its 1am and i need to sleep.#reblog#long post
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The Sun! I miss it!
#a serious lack of vitamin D as soon as October rolls around sends me tumbling#I need yellows too bright to look at for more than a second and reds that make my eyes well up.#horse art#white horse#the sun#tarot#the sun tarot#art commissions#art of mine#illustrators on tumblr#graphite drawing#artists on tumblr
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Nya~
Transcript:
Yes, my kitties. Enjoy your lovely little crunchy snacks as we all together celebrate international women's day.
*chat meowing continues*
Oh, this? My pussy?
Transcript:
Well, I find all of this very easy to believe.
I’ve always gotten along rather well with cats, kitties, pussy if you’re vulgar.
It’s no challenge for me. You see, cats… Cats have always had a profound intelligence. A sort of wisdom.
And the ability to detect, of course…
That I am a cat myself.
*meowing*
Transcript:
(Reading a donation) Hey Gianni, man where were you?
Everyone at catboys anonymous missed you.
You were about to get your 72 month chip.
Alright. Allow me to answer this one as well.
I am no longer a part of catboys anonymous.
I am no longer anonymous. I am simply out in the open.
Next question.
Purrfect clip
Oh this? clip
I am a cat myself clip
Catboys anonymous clip
not a clip but for anyone who is wondering "why were there so many cat clips"
#gabriel ultrakill#ultrakill#my art#i hope this makes up for the lack of post yesterday#i was being forced to touch grass. no pc.#cough anyway. the only reason hes not wearing anythin in the pic is cause i didnt feel like drawing armor#its for the kitty's comfort ok#chat has access to a meow button. the effects are disastrous. it gets so loud#the voice effect is uhhh not great because CHAT could not contain themselves so i put the no effect one first#gabussy? for free?? more likely than u think
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Izutsumi character study
#dungeon meshi#izutsumi#One of my goals for this year was to spend more time doing art studies.#What better way to start than with my favourite danmeshi character (not seen: a whole page of figuring out her features)#I feel like she is by far one of the most poorly understood characters in the series. Partially due to her 'late party member' status.#'She's abrasive and mean' - 'she's a picky eater' - 'she's a catgirl who acts like an asshole cat ' YES and that is the point!#Everyone in dungeon meshi is traumatized and messy about it but izutsumi is just less polite in how she tries to cope.#Izutsumi is a extremely traumatized teenager who has utterly lacked autonomy her entire life.#She is the epitome of a “If I can just have X thing then all my problems will be solved!” character. And the X is 'Freedom'.#Her epilogue was one of the best and wrapped up her character so wonderfully (WARNING: I WILL NOW SPOIL PART OF THE ENDING)#Because she finally gets her freedom! She can go where she wants to and she doesn't need anybody! Yet...it doesn't fix her.#She is so focused on doing only what she wants that she forgets her own needs. Sometimes you have to eat the things you don't want.#And sometimes you have to face the hard truths that you need more than just one thing to make you happy.#Life is not all about only seeking pleasures and avoiding pain. You need to be balanced in order to grow.#Eat your vegetables (including the metaphorical ones: I am eating more art veggies this year by doing art studies!!!)
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I'm glad you're evil too - Pinocchio-P
#end roll#russell seager#chris (end roll)#chrissell#my art#LONG TIME NO CHRISSELL#not for lack of trying bc holy frick this took FOREVER to do#it is !!! the first pic in my plans to illustrate a questionably large portion of the playlist i'm making for them. SWEATS#(which i'll def share too once i'm satisfied enough)#been really hyped for just about all of them coming after this tho so i hope it goes well 😳#i have uhhh over 10 thumbnails done already i think#everything else was more easily inspired and should be a lot more approachable#so look forward to more of that hopefully more quickly than this took WHEEZE#i just upgraded to csp v3 so i can now say with tangibility that i spent over 20 hours 'finishing up' alone sob#just REALLY wanted to get it done first bc it's def the best opener#also gonna confess that i stole this particular song association from someone else associating it w them already#i've known of the song for a long time but had never listened to it super closely before
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i dunno what to write for the title
the different style feels lowkey funny
#dislyte#dislyte fanart#digital art#dislyte chu yao#art#well#honestly i kinda#doubt some artistic choice i make#and im very mixed abt this piece#i feel very lacking haha#but#that mean just need keep trying it out#also i was so torn between the rendering style#i ended up switched to smt more eccentric rather than just render it all soft#so yeh#also i LOVE chu yao sm like vgdshjs
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I'm going to be a bit busy for a bit so here's a wip from a bit ago to tide ye over ^^
#art wip#ofmd fanart#i've been on a s1 art binge recently#i think it makes up for the lack of art i made when s1 was airing#clown tag (honk honk)#izzy hands#stede bonnet#not gonna tag more than that bc i don't wanna clog up other tags with a wip lmao
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truly at the end of the day its all about receiving validation
#<- was having a lot of fun drawing fat william till he stopped to think about what other people might think#<- very important that people like him just as much as i do#<- incredibly important (i love him so much and his character is so much more nuanced than the fandom ever gives him credit for#and he already gets shat on way too often by people who don't understand what they're talking about)#truly the amount of hate based around him being a murderer is insane. Brother he's not a real life murderer. he's not going to#come out of the screen and hurt you#I NEED PEOPLE TO AT LEAST LIKE HIM A LITTLE BIT *bursts into tears*#and i need validation#and getting people to simp for him and think oh hes hot 😳 is one of the easier and more entertaining ways to get nice comments#what i lack in skill and talent i can make up for in character design and suggestive subtext right?#ugh#i dunno it feels like the only way to get people to say sometjing nice about my art sometimes#don't get me wrong i adore drawing him slutty but. ougggghhhhhh#hope it doesnt sound like im implying he's less attractive if hes fat personally i think hes hot as fuck#its mostly about stupid ass conventionally attractive shit#and also that people get bullied for portraying him fat... That too#anyways#im normal again now#toxi.txt
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Did y'all see yesterday's Starfield strip? 💙🏳️⚧️✨
(Pssst... you can get this as a print or on a t-shirt over on my Redbubble store!)
#⭐ Star's Art ⭐#Starfield#Garfield#Garfield Comic#Micah Vandenburg#Sheep Fursona#Fursona#Furry#Furry Art#Comic#Medibang Paint Pro#Coolness#I've been on a bit of a Garfield kick lately. Can you tell?#Originally this was meant to be a redraw of the infamous 'Huh. I wonder who that's for' macro from Garfield and Friends...#... which by the way he never actually says (The more you know!)...#... though I thought it would be way more fun to adapt it into a three-panel comic!#A lot more attention to detail went into this than you might think. Take for instance the lack of a border on the second panel#A detail you'll find present in nearly every Garfield strip ever illustrated!#I also styled my fursona a bit after Lanolin Sheep from US Acres which was another comic Jim Davis wrote#It was nice to actually have a sheep character in his style to go off of when drawing the transfem sheeb in the Garfield style#I must admit this was drawn solely because I thought 'Starfield' was a funny enough play on words to make into a drawing.#This was lots of fun though! May end up doing a full-body drawing of my fursona in this style sometime 💙✨
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idk how long my laptop will survive seeing as i hardly use it anymore so anyway here's an abandoned project from a couple of years ago where i ambitiously tried to make an rpg with the yokai outfits. here are some sprites i made
#identity v#aesop carl#identity v embalmer#joseph desaulnier#identity v photographer#tracy reznik#identity v mechanic#this is a part 1 i have more. but its not enough for an entire game#i had a couple of glaring plotholed i couldnt resolve#n tbh by the time i got to the other sprites i didnt like the way aesop n joseph turned out cos i did them first#i also meant to shade them but i couldnt get around to it. i think the flats are nicer but i also feel like i should shade#project death by perfectionism. if anyone wants to hear more im more than happy to share about this#i could probably dig up the docs somewhere. i dont have the time or energy to make a full blown game#i am so bad at coding#also shoutout n apology to ish aka azzy mun cos she offered to help with this#but i disappointed both her and myself by not having anything very concrete. im sorry ish but also thank u for the help#anyway seeing as the blog is slowly dying due to lack of asks n interactions n also my full time job that hates me#i might as well dump these here for archive sake#unconcerned art#part 2 coming soon
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ur post about queerbaiting and the dismissal of people in fandom to critical analysis is so incredibly true thank you. i feel like marcille's writing in the anime has been super misogynistic a lot of the time and every time i bring this up all anyone wants to say is "well maybe this isn't for you! and you shouldn't watch the show!" like. i don't think this is about taste lmao, i am analyzing the text in front of me and coming to conclusions about the craft of it.
[This is in reference to this post]
YES!!! THANK YOU!!!!!
It is so so frustrating!!!!
It's like being at a restaurant and being served a bunch of delicious appetizers, but then one of the bread appetizers is literally just a plate of crumbs; and then when you're like, "Hey, uhh, why are we being served literal crumbs?", a bunch of the other folks eating at the restaurant are like,
"WELL HOW ABOUT YOU JUST DON'T EAT HERE THEN??!? YOU MUST NOT BE THAT HUNGRY, SO JUST FIND ANOTHER RESTAURANT AND DON'T EAT WITH US!!"
And maybe they say it politely, but "Aw, sorry, maybe this restaurant just isn't for you 💖" is just trading out an aggressive dismissive tone for a patronizing dismissive tone. It's the same message.
And it's like! I was honestly happy to move on from the crumbs once my complaint was acknowledged because the meal overall is still delicious, but then all these folks got SUPER WEIRD AND DEFENSIVE ABOUT IT, so now I find myself double-checking all the other dishes -- and, actually, you know what those eggs DO look a Iittle misogynistic undercooked!!!!
#original#queerbaiting#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi#falin x marcille#marcille x falin#marcille donato#delicious in dungeon#dungeon meshi marcille#listen i like marcille but u r right she is basically there to be a wet blanket a LOT of the time and that is a sexist trope#i think the bar is super super low for female characters in adventure anime and the lack of constant ogling maybe makes the female#characters feel better written than they are. i mean falin basically has no personality. she's got an innocent heart but that's nothing.#and i think these conversations are worth having bc no piece of media is perfect and this is how we learn to do better#also like. I've seen media criticisms that make me go 'oh you straight up should reserve commentary bc you#haven't watched the show and you're wrong' or 'i see what you're saying but you are simply incorrect' but like#i don't think I'd tell someone to just NOT watch Hazbin Hotel bc they have a bad take - and certainly not bc they have accurately#pinpointed a real flaw about the show (of which there are more than a few but frankly not what became the biggest subject of Disc Horse)#Angel is actually an amazing character & i think people mistook a criticism on the way abuse is glamourized as actually glamourizing abuse#like his song about abuse is called Poison and he's trapped in an abusive performance contract - bringing to mind Britney Spears#i think it is a wildly triggering and painful scene but i think a lot of people took the pain it gave them to mean it was bad art#but tbh they are still allowed to eat at the table if they so choose!!!#sorry i got sidetracked - as an abuse survivor Angel just matters a lot to me. i have a couple serious criticisms of vivziepop's work but#Angel is very much not one of them#also in regards to the actual subject of this post i think the most audacity of the responses i got was the one that said#that by complaining about queerbaiting I was 'de-incentivizing writers to write any interaction b/t women that could look even a little gay#and I'm just like. good. I hope they stop writing entirely. if the takeaway from 'please don't sell me bread and then serve me crumbs' is#'WELL NOW I JUST WON'T BAKE ANY BREAD PRODUCT' then that person is a bad chef. they should find a different job.#or at least do a whole lot of work on themselves. but either way i wouldn't be too broken up to know i won't be getting any food from them.#'just leave then' is so obviously a gut reaction defense mechanism & it implies media criticism should only be for things you don't like
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I think the absolutely most baffling thing to me that I've noticed in the AI generated image discourse is that people seem to think that artists don't make any compromises or sacrifices ever and live perfect, comfortable lives where things just happen to align perfectly for them to have the time to create art that perfectly aligns with their vision
"I don't have the time to draw" do you really know if artists simply have the time to draw or on the contrary, have to sacrifice something to gain that time to draw? can you be so sure that they don't have to deal with hardships to gain the time to draw? or, they have the time to draw because they can't do something else in their lives due to their circumstances, and drawing is the only thing that will fill this time?
"I can't create stuff that meets my vision" how can you be so sure that the stuff artists create meets their vision? do you really think this art was their vision from the absolute beginning? or did they actually have to make compromises to reach this specific look, which maybe wasn't what they aimed for to begin with? can you even be sure if the medium they spend the most time on is the medium they intended to pick up from the beginning, or is it a medium they've had to pick up to compromise for not picking up another art form they wanted to stick to in the first place due to myriads of reasons?
you folks seem to make a lot of assumptions about people you don't personally know
#hazy rambles#anti ai#anti ai art#ai discourse#i had a dogshit laptop for some time years ago and had to make tons and tons of compromises when using it for drawing#like merging layers etc bc that laptop lacked processing power#it would shit itself every time i drew something bigger than 1000x1000 pixels with 10+ layers#so i had to constantly merge layers whenever drawing bc else it would lag like hell#couldn't even listen to music on that thing while drawing bc it would just chug#so i had to make lots and lots of compromises and learn different techniques due to these compromises#hell me using computer to draw is a compromise in a way!#i did lots and lots of traditional art before getting into digital art!#and digital art is a whole lot more practical for me bc traditional art supplies can take up a lot of space#something which i don't have a whole lot of#and i know many people can relate#anyways when i look at all of those roadblocks and obstacles people mention as justification for not drawing#and just gravitating towards AI generated images instead of making compromises or pick up another medium as an outlet#sorry not sorry but i don't think you actually /want/ to create art#you just want pretty pictures and don't understand the process behind the creation process to begin with#art is not about the destination but the journey#and if you're not willing to put up with the journey to reach the destination then art simply isn't for you#and i'm sorry but i have to be a little mean about this#especially when i've had to put up with people making lots of assumptions about me as if they personally knew me
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